I can't even begin to tell you how I feel right now. The whole idea of my husband not being on treatment is surreal. I feel like I dreamt that we went to the doctor, and I'm waiting to wake up.
Quite honestly, I know that right now my husband dreads the mere thought of going back on the treatment. It took everything out of him. I only hope that these feelings will pass. I know he had a really hard time. Words can't even describe how he felt. At times, he literally thought he might be dying. And still I can't help but feel it might be the only hope for us to have a future together.
Which is why I cried today when I saw the comment that Sheba left for me. She understands my hope and my fear. I read it to my husband. I just hope her words run through his mind if he gets the option to go back on treatment.
Thank you Sheba.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
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